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Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (15 unread)

April 09, 2006
1:27
People with HIV are not criminals.
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

No, you're right. In fact, everything you said in this article is right.

What's upsetting is what you left unsaid.

What's upsetting is the fact that you talk about UAE nationals who have HIV.

You talk about them with compassion. You talk about how there should be positive steps to employ them and reintigrate them with society.

You're right about all that.

But the expats? No mention. But of course. You're right. We aren't real people. We deserve to be slapped in chains and tossed out of the country, even if "many HIV patients are victims".

The sooner everyone here realises that we're ALL the same, regardless of race, gender or religion, the sooner this place will reach it's potential. The longer it takes, the lower the likelihood of that potential ever being reached.
March 29, 2006
5:13
There is no Compulsion in Religion...
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

.. so says the Qur'an.

And the Shari'a says that apostates are to be killed.

Putting aside the obvious contradiction there.. I have a question.

What happens to a child who is born of Muslim parents (i.e. never actually turned to Islam, was just born that way) and wants (at an older age) to change his religion?

I know that by Islamic law, that child (assuming he/she is of age) would be killed.
But does that make sense? He is leaving a religion that he was not asked to join.

I'm going to use the above as a springboard to my real topic. One that actually effects me.

We (Arabs, Muslims, whatever) have really got to do something about our image. Our public face. The way the rest of the world sees us.

Because, frankly, this is getting ridiculous.

I hate the fact that I, because of my ethnicity, am seen as a machete wielding (or, in modern terms, suicide belt wearing) maniac.

So what can we do about it? Well.. for one thing, I suggest that Islamic scholars take a good long look at the section marked in bold above. One of the reasons that Islam is seen as a 'barbaric' and 'savage' religion, is because of the fact that people who are Muslim, feel a compulsion, if you will, to stay Muslim.

The solution is simple, really. Stop forcing people to stay. Islam will lose all but the faithful, so there might be quite a large exodus at first (public and private). But it will be a strong first step towards a religious peace-of-sorts.

And, as time goes on, if Islam continues to follow a gentler path, more and more people will change their points of view. And the religion will regain it's title of 'fastest growing religion'.

Or I could be wrong. Fuck it. Off with all their heads.
March 25, 2006
7:20
Rules of the Road
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

It's funny. The blog pages are generally filled with people talking about the state of the roads in this city, and yet, when this got published, I didn't hear any response. Up to me then!

So they've proposed a new system of traffic fines in the UAE. Well, it really is about damned time, don't you think?

The only problem is.. well.. has anyone read the new rules? This is going to have people up in arms, eventually. So might as well start now.

And without further ado, here's SmokeyMirror's (unofficial) Guide to (and analysis of) the New Traffic Fine System Thing.

(Note: The article I got these off is abysmally written (Khaleej Times? Badly written? Never!). So I've taken the liberty of organising the information.)

The first major point is that we're going to have a demerit system on our driving licenses. Get too many demerit (black) points (24 to be exact) and there goes your license for a few months.

Second, they've increased the fine amounts a tad. Some of these ideas seem pretty good. Some... not so much. Others, I can't really tell, because KT mangled them so badly that I have no idea what the rule in question is referring to. I'm going to go through the rules that I find particularly interesting.

"Non-adherence to the rules governing loading and unloading in car parking lots"
Er.. What rules? I've never seen any of these 'rules'.

Parking in front of fire hydrants, in handicapped spots and places reserved for ambulances : 1000dh fine and 4 demerit points (dp).
That's actually fantastic. I'd say hang the driver as well. Lot's more of these coming.

Going over the permitted level of window tinting : 1000dhs and 4dp
Ha! This is going to be an interesting one to enforce.

"Use of motor vehicles for purposes other than those designated" : 1000dhs and 4dp
???

"causing moderate damage to motor vehicles" : 1000dhs + 4dp
"causing light damage to motor vehicles" : 1000dhs + 3dp
That's just great. Because we needed something to keep people involved in an accident to stay out on the road, yelling and shouting at each other, even LONGER.

"not fastening the seat belt" : 1000dhs + 3dp
Nicely done

"stopping in the middle of the road without reason" : 1000dhs + 3dp
I wonder if 'stopping to get roast chicken from Shami restaurant' is a good enough 'reason'

"stopping in the yellow box" : 1000dhs + 3dp
No no and NO! This should be a capital offence if ever there was one!

"not giving priority to pedestrians" : 1000dhs + 3dp
I'm torn on this one. It feels too much like we're legislating common sense.. but then again, look where we are.

"writing words and expressions and placing posters on the motor vehicle"
??

"not maintaining a sufficient distance between the cars ahead" : 1000dhs + 2dp
Interesting.. SZR is going to be a very boring place when they pass this.

"driving at night and in a foggy weather without using lights" : 1000dhs + 2dp
Yes! Only DOUBLE THE FINE if the bastard has his hazards on!

"not giving way to the car coming from behind forcing it to pass to the left hand side" : 1000dhs + 2dp
Now this is interesting. So. A guy's coming at me at 170kph flashing his lights, and I don't move for him 'forcing him to pass me on the left'. The cops see this. Am I at fault for 'not giving way', or is he at fault for speeding? What if we aren't in the fast lane? Does this rule basically say 'the road now belongs to the speed demons'?

Here's where it gets brilliant. This whole bit needs a-quotin'.

three dangerous violations like racing while driving, driving vehicles without registration plates and exceeding the speed limit by over 60 km per hour, will entail a fine of Dh2,000 and 24 black points

Notice the three 'dangerous' violations. Superspeeding. Check. Racing. Check. Driving without a registration?!

"Jumping a red light" : 2000dhs + 12dp
Brilliant. Shoot the driver in a kneecap as well.

"escaping from traffic police" 2000dhs and 6dp
Heheh.. That's brilliant. The red light gets him 12dp but racing the cops gets him 6?

"being involved in overturning a vehicle" : 1000dhs and 6dp
Er.. Congratulations on being alive, give us 1000dhs?

"reckless driving" : 2000dhs 12dp
Fair enough. Good one.

And everyone's favorite: "overtaking on the hard shoulder" : 2000dhs and 6dp. No complaints there.

The third change: Radar fines are going to be different!

Going over the speed limit by up to 10kmph : 600dh + 1dp
Going over the speed limit by up to 20kmph : 800dh + 2dp
Going over the speed limit by up to 30kmph : 1000dh + 6dp
Going over the speed limit by up to 40kmph : 1200dh + 8dp
Going over the speed limit by up to 50kmph : 1400dh + 10dp
Going over the speed limit by up to 60kmph : 1600dh + 12dp

Now.. I wonder what this means. Is it 10kmph over the posted speed limit? Or is it 10kmph over the speed limit that we all know (which is the posted speed limit + 20kmph)?

All in all, some of these rules are brilliant. Others, not quite so. But the important thing to note is this: These rules will change nothing! Well. They might. As long as a couple of things change as well.

First of all: Cops have to get more authority to pull drivers over for committing an offence.
Second, and this is key (and an extension to 1)): No more (aside from speeding) absentee tickets. How many people drive around this country in their father's/friend's/etc cars? When you issue them an absentee ticket, you haven't punished them one bit. Start pulling people over!

Oof. I'm tired.
6:24
Rebirth?
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

I think so. It's been long enough.

And now that I have a job (yay), I have WAY too much free time during the day. Time enough to come up with a post every now and then.

So, here's to snmDubai. I'm back baby!
September 20, 2005
16:57
Time's a wastin'
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

Well, it's been a while. Things have been a little interesting lately.. don't know if it's due to the weather (hot and sunny) or the boredom. Most likely a little bit of both.

My job hunt continues, but the momentum has seriously slowed down over the past few days. I'm reaching a decision point in my life right about now, and it's making me rethink the work thing.

See, I've got this condition. Keratoconus, for the interested. Basically, it's a degenerative disease of the cornea. In my case, I'm eventually going to have to have a corneal transplant (two of them, rather). I've known this for about 10 years now. The surgery can probably be delayed for a few more years if I keep trying different types of contact lenses, but (and here's where the decision comes in) I've been having trouble justifying delaying it any more.

Basically, the way I see it, I'm about to start my life for real. Wouldn't it make more sense to start out with the best vision I can have? This is especially relevant seeing as my job will most likely have me staring at a computer screen for 9 hours a day. As it stands right now, I can wear my contacts for about 12 hours before they dry out completely and turn the following day into a nightmare of red, painful eyes.

Also, I have plans to leave this country in a few years. It'll be a lot easier for me to do this surgery here, now, when I have my close friends and family around. I'm looking at around 2 years of healing, so this is quite an important issue.

Meeting with my doctor in a few days (don't have a set appointment yet) to discuss this. We'll see what he has to say.

I'm hoping he goes for it.. I want this mess to be over.
September 05, 2005
5:10
Sadness and apathy
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

A few days ago, the hurricane Katrina swept up the Gulf of Mexico and smashed it's way through the States of Mississippi, Alabama and Lousiana.

We've all heard of the devestation in New Orleans. We've all heard the stories of people trapped in the superdrome, surrounded by corpses and human waste. At last report, 80% of the city is underwater with the estimate being given at 'weeks' before the water clears.

It's like something out of a movie.. An entire city, almost completely wiped out in blow.

And yet.. where are the donation drives? The fund raiser concerts? Where's the world's sympathy?

This has been a big year for natural disasters. The tsunami in East Asia, the flooding in Mumbai, and now this.

In both the former cases, conversation was continuously buzzing with concern for the victims. But now?

Is it that we've become jaded to this sort of thing?

Or is it something far more sinister? Is it because it was America that took the hit? Could that possibly be the reason? Are we that petty?

I try to imagine what the world's reaction would have been like had this happened under Clinton.

Hell.. I don't even need to. Remember Septermber 11th? Clinton had been gone for a few months, and no one really knew who this Texan was. Do you remember the outpouring of grief and support in the days following the attacks? In those days, everyone stood behind America (except the fundies, but seriously, fuck them). We gave them a blank check of goodwill, and told them to spend it as they wished.

And four years later, the world looks on with apathy as a city falls.

Remember people. You may not like their government's policies.. but the people who've lost everything aren't the ones making those policies. They're just people, like you and me.

Help them if you can.
September 03, 2005
6:00
You tell us our Internet is back to normal...
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

.. then tell me this:

Why do I have to tunnel past your garbage proxy to play my online games?

Why do I still have problems connecting to my websites?

Why do I need to enter your 'transparent' proxy into my configuration to use ftp?

Why don't you realise that if you're honest with your customers, they just might not abandon you the MINUTE there's another alternative?
August 21, 2005
6:47
Nothing but a drifter
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

The past couple of weeks have been.. interesting.

It's funny. The two months after graduation went by pretty quick.. I was having a great time relaxing, being a completely non-productive member of society basically.

Then three weeks ago, I decided to look for work.

Now, time is dragging along.. Instead of relaxing, I'm all anxious and frustrated.. and worst of all.. bored!

On the bright side, the SLF and I are working on a project right now, a website for a friend of hers. No money in it, but at least it's something to do. And it'll look pretty good on the ol' portfolio when it's done.

And this Thursday, we head down to Abu Dhabi to start out 'top secret hush hush' negotiations with other friends of ours. We're starting a sort-of-kind-of company.. Don't want to get into details yet, but it could be interesting. It'll be a lot easier due to the SLF being a local..

Anyways. More on that later.
August 15, 2005
5:13
Customer Disservice
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

A couple of stories that highlight the state of customer service in this country.

A couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine ordered a couch from a well-known furniture outlet (not Ikea, the other one). They promised him that they would deliver it the following thursday "between 4 and 10pm".

And there's problem number 1. What the hell kind of a time range is that??

So my friend had to sit at home, wasting his weekend, waiting for these people to show up and put his couch in. They ended up showing up at around 8 and proceeded to spend an hour putting the couch together, only to realise (oops) that a key piece was missing.

They apologise, and then say that they'd bring over the missing part on SUNDAY, sometime between (wait for it) 4 and 10pm.

I have no problem with the missing part. Mistakes happen. But the fact that their solution was to have my friend spend ANOTHER afternoon waiting at home.. an afternoon that was three days after the promised delivery date.. that's just unbelievable.

So what happened? My friend called them on Saturday, and threatened to cancel the payment on the couch if the missing piece wasn't in his apartment by 7pm that day. He'd paid by American Express, so his threat was actually valid (good ol' Amex).

Sure enough, the missing piece was fully installed by 7 that evening. That's what it took? A threat? That's a great way to do business.

The other story involves our beloved ISP here in the UAE.

As anyone living here will have noticed, the Internet has been pretty broken over the past few weeks. The problem seems to be a broken undersea cable somewhere near India.

Again, I have no problems with that.. Accidents happen, it's nobody's fault.

But after dealing with Etisalat over the past few years.. does anyone here believe that we'll get any sort of refund for the crippled net service? In fact, we don't even expect it.

As the gamers and hardcore file downloaders amongst you will know, this same problem happened back in March or April this year. I heard a story about a guy who was demanding some sort of refund on his 1mb dsl line. The Etisalat manager's response was basically along the lines of, "We're sorry sir. Our high speed internet is only meant for web browsing."

You want to have a laugh? Find the contract you signed with those people whenever you got internet. See what they guarantee.

There are disclaimers in there that defy all logic. "Etisalat does not guarantee a connection"...

Do they not realise that they are no longer the sole power in the telecom world here? If rumors are to be believed, Dubai's own telecom will be up and running early next year, offering unproxied (crosses fingers) and possibly cheaper service.

I know I'm switching out of nothing more than spite.
August 09, 2005
13:04
Geekly Joy
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

Lots of new toys to play with!

First, a friend of ours decided that she had no real use for a blue-tooth headset that she won, (or was given, not sure about this one. Nor do I really care.) so she gave it to me. I'm waiting for it to charge now.. next step is to see if it'll work with my iMate. Chances are slim, but it's something new to play with!

As if that isn't enough, I was in the Computer Center today with the SLF looking for something to help her extend the range of her wireless network at home. We found something interesting; did you know you could connect your DSL network through your power lines? Well, you can. I'm impressed.

So anyways. We're in the mall, and I realise (she reminds me) that I need a new printer, seeing as mine conked out a couple of days ago. We take a look at a couple of cheap ones, but nothing really catches my eye till I see the HP PSC 2350. It's a printer / scanner / copier / photo-printer all in one. With an all-in-one memory card reader built right into the base! I love it!

As I'm typing this, I've printed out my resume to test how fast this thing works. Wow. Seconds! SO much faster than my last POS printer.

And the scanner should be bloody helpful with my 3D work, seeing as my old scanner (and I stress the old) is pretty dead. Sketch -> Scan -> Model. Brilliant.

I'm going back to play now.

Gods I'm a geek.
August 08, 2005
8:04
Post-interview blueness
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

So get this.

It seems that Reputable Company is currently under a worldwide hiring freeze. They couldn't even hire me if they wanted to. So why interview me? Seems the GM liked my resume and wanted to get to know me, and see if he could help me get a job with some other company in the same field.

Sound like good news, right?

Only problem is that we're currently in the middle of one of the summer. In Dubai, that means all the decision makers at the major companies are away on vacation. So the timeline I'm looking at before GM of Reputable Company gets back to me? 6 - 8 weeks, minimum. So either I go out and look for another job, possibly throwing away a great opportunity, or I sit on my ass for another sixtoeight weeks.

Some choice.
August 07, 2005
3:40
Off to the interview
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

Nervous.

Nervous nervous nervous.

Leaving in about 20 minutes.. A whole 3 hours early. I have to run past my (ex) university and see if they can hurry things up with their graduation process; it'll save me trouble with my visa stuff if I get the job.

Not to mention any names, but seeing as my university is from a continent where they do everything backwards, I might be looking at a wait till December before I can get my 'official' degree. Gah.

And after the university thing is taken care of, I'm off to the media city with a book. Coffee for an hour and a half before my interview. That should really calm me down. Specially seeing as (as far as I know) I can't have a smoke with my coffee in the DMC*.

Except me to act like a gerbil on some high quality Bolivian cocaine.

Best. Interview. Ever.

Sigh..

*Not that I'm complaining. If I wasn't a smoker, I'd get annoyed sitting near people who were. We're filthy like that.
August 06, 2005
5:14
Portfolio Break
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

Second day in a row just sitting at home. It's been so long since I've had to put together a portfolio that my work is completely scattererd all over my computer. It'll take forever to piece it all together...

Worth it though if I get the job. Who'd have thought.. I get myself a computer science degree, and my second job interview is with a Reputed Company looking for 3D graphics people. Not that I'm complaining at all... It's a field I've been fighting to get into for six years now. All fingers crossed.

So hopefully in a week or so, I'll finally be making some much-needed cash. It'll definitely help out in the living situation.. Another year in Deira is going to kill me. Specially as the Reputed Company is in the DMC. I haven't quite gotten to the point where I miss the stop-and-go, crawl-and-sprint rollercoaster that is Sheikh Zed Road.

Although if If there's one good thing about this city, it's this: the day-to-day driving adventures really do give you an appreciation for life. And limb.
August 05, 2005
16:13
The week ahead
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

Right. SLF just took off so I figured I'd toss in a post before bed.

Looks like I've got quite a week ahead of me. Had my first job interview on Thursday (and got a pretty poor offer.. but hey, call it backup) and I've got another one this Sunday, all the way out in the Media City. Till then, I've got a portfolio to work on.

Seems like my last summer vacation really is over..
9:38
Hello, me!
» ‎ Smoke and Mirrors in Dubai (uae)

Before we begin, a big 'Thank You' to Gulf News and to Secretdubai for convincing / inspiring me to finally start my own blog. God knows Dubai needs more people expressing themselves.

And now that we're through with the formalities, time for me to jump in the shower. The Special Lady Friend is on her way over for a nice quiet evening.

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